Reflections at the Close of a Chapter
This evening I continued the packing I’ve been doing over the past several days. Sorting, making decisions, taking out another bag of garbage, and reflecting on life.
I made myself some supper as I continued “operation eat everything that’s left.” Tonight’s meal consisted of cold BBQ pizza with a side of sauteed eggplant and garlic, and a glass of wine from a bottle that had been opened too long ago. I’m roughing it over here as I prepare myself for life in the missions.
As I come to the close of this chapter in life, I ponder all that it has held for me. I think about my family and the joy of being near them, the friendships I’ve made and deepened, the church community I’ve been given, the professional growth I’ve experienced, and the musical opportunities that have filled my spirit. All of this makes me recall that charming line from Winnie the Pooh: “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
I thank God for the clarity of the call I’ve received, without which I would be struggling to make sense of this next step. I know that He is asking me to leave something good for a greater good. I am confident that He has even greater blessings in store.
I surrender to God the difficult memories, the moments of heartbreak and sorrow, the times of regret and confusion, the anxieties and failures. Even the painful moments have played an important part in this chapter. I can’t move on without laying them down at His feet and praying for healing wherever it is needed.
When I was younger, I craved adventure. I valued the new and unknown. I carried a youthful zeal for mission. These days I find myself longing more and more for stability—and yet He continues to call me out of my comfort zone into that unknown I once found so attractive. He tugs at my heart, and I cannot resist. Even if my nature wants to stay, my spirit compels me to go. The joy and peace that result from answering the call are undeniable.
So I bring this chapter to a close and step into a new one. Trepid, yet full of trust in the one who calls, I step out my front door and say to my God, “I am quite ready for another adventure.”
I made myself some supper as I continued “operation eat everything that’s left.” Tonight’s meal consisted of cold BBQ pizza with a side of sauteed eggplant and garlic, and a glass of wine from a bottle that had been opened too long ago. I’m roughing it over here as I prepare myself for life in the missions.
As I come to the close of this chapter in life, I ponder all that it has held for me. I think about my family and the joy of being near them, the friendships I’ve made and deepened, the church community I’ve been given, the professional growth I’ve experienced, and the musical opportunities that have filled my spirit. All of this makes me recall that charming line from Winnie the Pooh: “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
I thank God for the clarity of the call I’ve received, without which I would be struggling to make sense of this next step. I know that He is asking me to leave something good for a greater good. I am confident that He has even greater blessings in store.
I surrender to God the difficult memories, the moments of heartbreak and sorrow, the times of regret and confusion, the anxieties and failures. Even the painful moments have played an important part in this chapter. I can’t move on without laying them down at His feet and praying for healing wherever it is needed.
When I was younger, I craved adventure. I valued the new and unknown. I carried a youthful zeal for mission. These days I find myself longing more and more for stability—and yet He continues to call me out of my comfort zone into that unknown I once found so attractive. He tugs at my heart, and I cannot resist. Even if my nature wants to stay, my spirit compels me to go. The joy and peace that result from answering the call are undeniable.
So I bring this chapter to a close and step into a new one. Trepid, yet full of trust in the one who calls, I step out my front door and say to my God, “I am quite ready for another adventure.”
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